Author Topic: Ultimate Carnage 3 FEEDBACK  (Read 221 times)

Offline Boss Joe

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Ultimate Carnage 3 FEEDBACK
« on: December 02, 2017, 01:54:45 AM »
I demand feedback for Ultimate Carnage 3. The judges, and more importantly, the MATCH WRITERS (Caleb, Zodiac, Duane) put a ton of work into this show to make it the best it could be, especially WAR GAMES, which took three whole posts on the thread just to complete. It was MASSIVE.

Do the feedback however you want to do it, but give props where it's due.

Offline Matchwriter Caleb

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Re: Ultimate Carnage 3 FEEDBACK
« Reply #1 on: December 02, 2017, 09:24:51 AM »
I'll start.

When I write a clusterfuck match, 'massive' is one of the main goals that I go for from the beginning.  I want everybody involved to feel like they went through absolute hell and deserve a standing ovation from the crowd, and that can be hard to do sometimes because somebody has to come in and go out first, so some people are simply going to get more 'screen time' than others.

Duane did a sensational job with the entrance sequence.  It felt fast paced, and the pressure was definitely on, especially during the disadvantages.  Lots of double-teaming, which is not the easiest thing to do with match-writing, allowed his sequence to really sell the idea of people coming in hot, making a huge splash, and then gradually winding down out of gas.

I just wrote filler for the middle to pad things out.  I wanted it to be long, so that even people who were going to be leaving the match earlier still got their own moments to shine.  That also gave me the advantage of being able to steal up a lot of the 'big spots', breaking people down until they were reasonably just one or two bad bumps away from elimination.  I apologize I didn't have more nearfalls.  Anybody who has read my match summaries know that nearfalls and tags basically never happen in my matches, and it's pretty well just a slugfest from bell to bell.  In re-reading the match, I feel like adding a few nearfalls would have built some more tension at various points.

Fortunately, Joe delivered in spades.  He got to pick things up when the whole roster was at the honest point of exhaustion, writing some really grueling exchanges that left things on the edge of their seat.  And he was able to sell the chaos in the ring to allow eliminations to be a little more fast paced, with people starting to drop like flies, which also does a lot to make everybody feel included, rather than the earlier eliminations being stuck with half the match still happening after them.  Joe made it exciting and competitive right to the end, where it felt like match could tip either way, which is great because that was how I felt about the RPs as well.  Joe had a vision for the ending, and it sold a really quality story, creating great new feud opportunities as a part of the 'dark days of Carnage' ideal.

As for OOC stuff, STK was being shelved after UC3 regardless of outcome.  Even if Team Kyra had won, even if Kyra beat Bridges and drove him out of Carnage, the kid was being kicked back to the stage crew and run out of active competition.  It has nothing to do with Carnage as a fed, or Joe as a fedhead; I love Carnage and will still be here daily, and I think Joe is doing a bang-up job.  And it's not a poor sport thing of quitting just because I'm on a four month losing streak.  Rather, I think that the reason I've been losing is because my heart hasn't quite been in my RPs the way it should be.  What I've been kicking out was just too mediocre, and it all came down to one thing.  When Chaos got shortened and the match summaries became abridged, the most exciting part of my week, reading these expertly crafted cards, felt a little flat.  There is simply no way for a 4 paragraph match to feel competitive or close.  If I win, I feel like it was too easy of a blowout.  If I lose, I feel like a chump who went down without a fight.  And that was what was needed for Joe to get the shows up on time.

My true passion for efedding has always been in those match summaries.  My motivation to RP feeds directly off those match summaries; when I write an RP, it's like I'm writing a Thank You letter to a fedhead for all the hard work they put into working on these shows.  Joe helped me understand that Carnage has an incredible roster filled with amazing talent; people who don't need me to be in the center of every story in order to make feuds happen that are about more than just the titles.  Carnage already has a strong roster of quality RPers; each of you do that for us.  What Carnage needed was somebody who could help Joe out and pick up a few more matches here and there, writing them throughout the week so that they'll be done by deadline day, that way the shows that we post can be our loveletter back to you, thanking you for the amazing RPs that you write.  I have a chance to write matches, which is truly what I love, without feeling like I need to RP in order to be allowed in the club.  The time that would have previously gone into an STK rp that you probably didn't bother to read can now go into banging out some more exhaustive match summaries to help your characters each get their own opportunities to shine.  I get to do what I love, writing horribly violent acts of depravity, and do it with a really cool bunch of people who I've grown quite fond of.

To do this though, I really need something from you.  I need Feedback.  I need to know what you liked, so I can do more of that.  I need to know what you DON'T like, so I can avoid annoying you by misusing your character.  I am always open to strategy ideas; if you shoot me a spot you want to work in, or a general theme to your character's approach, I promise you that I will find a way to implement it.  And I will always give you a match to read that feels like I put as much effort into the fight as what you did for the RP.

Please, leave Feedback, and help me to help you have even more fun here in Carnage, because that is what we're all here for in the end.

And thanks to Joe, to Chuck and Barbie, and to everybody else I've had the opportunity to work with, for making me feel like a part of the family.  Matchwriter Caleb will not let you down.
Building a good story is like building a car:  it takes more than one moving piece.  Your opponent is not an enemy that you need to work against, but a partner that you need to work WITH, so that together you can build the best possible story you both can make.

Offline Tweeder

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Re: Ultimate Carnage 3 FEEDBACK
« Reply #2 on: December 02, 2017, 10:01:41 AM »
Short and sweet reply, bloody brilliant. Loads of things happened and can take off from there.

One thing I liked, whoever wrote the part with Tweeder and Raab going after each other, did a great job at reading my rp about how Tweeder was going after Raab despite the size. Plus there was the aspect of capturing Prydor not trusting STK and also Team Kyra being disfunctional, but helping each other out...well sort of.


Offline Dustin i.e. Jack Michaels

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Re: Ultimate Carnage 3 FEEDBACK
« Reply #3 on: December 02, 2017, 10:07:59 AM »
As you guys know, I've been around this game for quite a long time and have on both sides of match reading and match writing more times than I can count. I have to say with the utmost honesty this is one of the most exciting and well-written pay-per-views I have ever seen. The excitement of the mystery opponent, Redemption versus JC, the world title match and the main event all were excellently written and had that passion that is missing in a lot of federations today.

Not to gloss over the preliminary matches but the war Games main event itself was absolutely tremendous. Obviously I am a bit more involved in that match which of course lends me to dissect it. I have been a fan of War Games matches for a long time and have seen many variations including my favorite elimination style. This match had me hanging on every paragraph waiting to see what would happen.

From a character standpoint, Jack was handled expertly. His ring savviness and Power were absolutely perfected here with special attention to detail that I was surprised frankly that everyone picked up on. He was written as a human character with an indomitable spirit and I was literally grinning ear-to-ear when he flipped out towards the end with Amber's unsightly demise. The scene where he pulls out the chain after she gets blasted by Lucas just made me giggle and feel like I was watching some old school NWA and WWF storytelling.

In 20 years of role-playing, I honestly believe that winning war games here was one of my biggest accomplishments and also one of my most difficult. I was pushed to write the best that I could by a group of extraordinary handlers on both teams. I am extremely appreciative of the opportunity I have here in Carnage and the fact that you view my character so positively. Kudos to the entire staff and to everyone who contributed not only in the segments for the show but in the role playing for the matches.
« Last Edit: December 02, 2017, 10:14:03 AM by Jack Michaels -Dustin- »

Offline Will Prydor

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Re: Ultimate Carnage 3 FEEDBACK
« Reply #4 on: December 02, 2017, 01:14:54 PM »
Having written the first third of War Games, all I can say is that I bow to the masters of the craft in CW. People will talk about the latter two-thirds of War Games for a while and for damn good reason. Iím just privileged I was able to help lead in to the absolute insanity that was the rest of that match. Even knowing that Will/STK was gonna happen in the match at some point like that, it was written brilliantly and now I have an arc for the next however long to work from, which Iíve already started on Twitter and all.

Aside from that, I legit marked out when GI made an appearance in the JC/Redemption bout. That match was just as brutal, and it was sad to see one of the two lose.

The world title bout was a close one in my view. Could have gone either way, but now with AJS taking an OOC sabbatical for December, Iím interested to see what the New Year brings in terms of challengersóIím not convinced in my mind that Willís ready.

All in all, no one has a reason to be upset at their showings here, unless theyíre their own worst critic like I am. :P Iím not sure how the hell we can follow or one-up this show. But itíll be fun to try.
Suggested reading: Will's RP history (still a WIP, updated through mid-2008)

Offline Ragnarok

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Re: Ultimate Carnage 3 FEEDBACK
« Reply #5 on: December 03, 2017, 02:45:06 AM »
This show was amazing, from the opening contest to the Main Event I honestly feel like each match was better than the last which to me is great. The War Games match was intense and surprising. I feel everyone definitely stepped up for it. The dynamic of Carnage will now be interesting as Bridges got what he wanted interested in seeing how everything plays out. Good job to everyone who wrote matches. You guys are amazing and consistently give me reasons to try and up my game as well. Great job guys

Offline Distorted Angel

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Re: Ultimate Carnage 3 FEEDBACK
« Reply #6 on: December 03, 2017, 11:26:55 PM »

It was shit.

I kid. I kid. Don't kill me <3

Seriously though, there isn't a lot I can say that hasn't already been said in regards to the ppv as a whole.

Aside from War Games, cause I'm bias as fuck :) I gotta say that the JC vs Redemption match had me so thoroughly hooked and if we hadn't been the main event- those two could have easily filled that spot and everyone would have walked away equally satisfied.

Everyone forced everyone else to bring their best and thats what I've really grown to love about Carnage- constantly setting the bar higher without leaving anyone behind :p and I thoroughly look forward to seeing what happens next... especially in the tag title and world title picture ;)

Overall, I'm gonna echo the cliche and say that i loved everything and the match writers and judges especially deserve all the credit we can muster, and all the love we have to give cause that was insane in the best possible way :)


4CW: 10-6-0
Carnage: 11-2-0
Life: 0-1-0

Offline Bowen ._.

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Re: Ultimate Carnage 3 FEEDBACK
« Reply #7 on: December 04, 2017, 10:37:53 AM »
Alright, I found the thingy!

Match of the Night: War Games
Why: Not only was this match utter insanity from start to finish, there were so many little bits and pieces that have built up for the longest time that finally came to the forefront, such as the battle between "The Rogues" and CON, especially with Trent and Crucifix (totally not bias or anything :p). I think all the eliminations were excellently planned out and showed the true colors of some of the characters, and the story of STK staying out of the match until near the end, even after Bridges threatened to fire him, was played out in a way that not only left me on the edge of my seat, waiting to see what comes next, but it leaves a bit of a leeway into things if Caleb decides to bring STK back for a bit after shooting out a ton of epic matches for the future of the fed.

Segment of the Night: Hall of Legends
Why: Johnny Vegas is by far my favorite character here in Carnage Wrestling. He is the epitome of what a heel commentator should be (at least, an old drunken heel commentator) and the way he took his induction to the Hall of Legends was both fitting to the character and hilarious at the same time. Kudos to Boy and Vegas for making it into the Hall of Legends. Maybe Terra can finally get to join her fellow commentators next year maybe.

Favorite Angle: The Retirement of Redemption
Why: Being arguably the largest singles angle of the night, I felt both Joe and Andrew truly sold things as the end of an era, not just in Carnage, but in E-fedding as a whole. In Andrew's RP I realized something about Redemption that I feel everyone else already knew. Redemption has nothing. The only thing he has to a friend is a figment of his imagination, and after what Sabiru did to his brothers, I don't think Redemption even has any family left. I feel bad for the Redemption character, and his retirement kinda leaves us in a predicament with Trent and Cerberus (who was Redemption's whipping boy) no longer under the control of Redemption and are able to be their own men here in Carnage.

Favorite One-Liner (Show):

Johnny Vegas: Holy shit! REDEMPTION IS DRAKE MUNDAY!

Why: Because I said so >_>

Biggest Surprise: GI showing up
Why: I thought the dude was still hurt, honestly. All that means now is that I gotta hide for using his move on JC.

Best Spot of Show: Black Heart Crisis from the roof to the ring.
Why: Part of me thought Crucifix had just killed Trent, but he ended up being fine. I think this must've been what Joe meant when he told Caleb that people should be dead after some of the spots in the match ._.

Overall Show Rating: 10
Why: Everything on this show (save for the Lobo segment. I apologize for how awkward it was) flowed really well. From Bryan Ford vs Ragan Maclean to the War Games match, it emanated that big show feel, so yeah ... that also answers the final question.

Overall, the show was amazing. It's going to be hard to top this one, but I'm sure we can do it at Ultimate Carnage 4 at the latest. I've said this before, but I'm very thankful for the opportunities Carnage has given Rob and I not only as a tag team, but as singles competitors. A year ago our characters were at the bottom of the barrel, with Crucifix being possibly under the barrel with how shite I was as a writer. I just didn't care about writing anymore due to something I like to call "OWF Syndrome", but when I came to Carnage, that all changed. A year ago we wouldn't have dreamed of main eventing a show as large and important as Ultimate Carnage, especially not with the level of writers we were competing with and against. So, thank you, guys. It means a lot to me.

Offline Trent Steel

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Re: Ultimate Carnage 3 FEEDBACK
« Reply #8 on: December 05, 2017, 11:24:24 PM »
So after a few days of sickness and what not I'm finally posting this.

This is probably the most moving ppv I've been a part of since that last Kill Trent match in OWF except it's the whole fucking show.

This is what I wish real wrestling was again. You feel pathos, there is a story, there is a feeling of gut wrenching apocalypse in almost every damn hit. The grudge matches are just as visceral as the world title match. Every match and every RP hit hard and it hit good. So many were up in the air and so many could have went either way. Myself I had to write multiple seg for that last one I did because I didn't know what was going on. That's a testament to everyone making me pull a crisis of infinite Trents. :p

My only negative to this is that we didn't have enough time to build this up a bit more for a few matches, but that's just me being nitpicky. Everyone got a chance to shine in their matches. Gutwrenching as it is it was a beautiful full story pay per view. The main sadness for me right now is that we are down two handlers characters. Two really good ones went down and that is going to force some interesting things. I hope the undercard is ready to move up because storyline wise this place just took a massive hit.

What I look forward to the most is where we go from here because I can honestly say this. I can't think of a better group, barring a few who are not here who should be but they have their reasons, of people to work with in our collective storytelling unit. This has me pumped up in more ways than one. I feel like now we can hit some more high notes in the coming weeks. I know we have a "light hearted" pay per view coming up but I am planning to keep this pace going into the next year. I guess what I am saying is this ppv is awe inspiriing and a muse to me lately.

So thanks to everyone for their hard work.

Duane, Joe, and Caleb did a great job on that War Games match. Hands down ten characters. Ten different set of motivations. Ten people getting the spotlight. Nine heartbreaks over who won and who lost. I gotta say hats off to everyone who RPed and worked hard on that match. I also want to give particular shout out to Joe and Andrew for the grudge match from hell. Our World Champion and her worthy opponent deserve some praise to. The storyline for that was a great one and I feel like it was not overshadowed by the other two big matches on the card. Three great stories have ended and where do we go from here...

And that's where we are and I'm happy to be here.